Today, Mama and Papa were going to Ikea. I hope they bring something nice and wooden home for me to destroy. But you have got to hear what they did to me! Papa was measuring something in the guest room, took his measurements and left. Normally, I'm not allowed in the guest room, so they keep the door closed. This time, I sneaked in and was skulking about in the corner while Papa did his thing. Then, he locked me in! What the heck? Am I some prisoner in Uganda*?! I got my revenge, though. Mama still has some of her doll collection stuff in there, so I got to taste a mohair wig! It was a little on the plastic-tasting side. I didn't enjoy it. My liberation came thanks to Lunch. Papa knocked over the baby gate that keeps the cat in the computer room and Lunch bolted under Mama and Papa's bed, from what I overheard. Talk about fast food! Lunch, run and hide! I heard Papa say, "Where's the dog?" and after a moment he came into the guest room. There I was, happily standing over my handiwork--a mohair doll wig and a small clump of chewed up mohair that I spit out. Yuck!
*Note: Shibas are not indigenous to Uganda, nor are they mistreated by any Ugandans at all. Ayato's parents do not endorse any of his claims to Shiba abuse, nor any military actions against a country he has randomly picked to harass.